Believing While Suffering

Reflecting over the last few months, I have become intimately acquainted with my own personal suffering and the sufferings of others. I’m feeling it all – friends getting horrible diagnosis and undergoing surgeries; parents/grandparents of friends and acquaintances stricken with cancer and steeped in radiation and chemo; church members still experiencing joblessness and trying to cope with hopelessness; marriages in trouble; “Christians” darkened by their own sinfulness; fellow-pastor friends suffering while watching and living through on the outside of mental constraints on their loved ones while others hold onto hope when the medical community doesn’t really have viable answers for a healing treatment. It’s been a long couple of months of sadness and grief all around me. I am incredibly aware more than ever of the intensity of my tears and grief as I feel for those who are hurting.

Although intense, my personal suffering is merely a blip in comparison to what those are experiencing around me. At the same time, I am well aware of my own delay and failed alertness in praying diligently for everyone. How much do I pray? How long should I pray? What do I pray? Is God hearing everyone’s prayer? Where’s the time God with all of my stuff as well as others? God I know you hear me and others, when are you going to answer?

“We believe you can heal” because the Scriptures are packed with witnesses that attest to your ability (John 4, 46-54; 5:1-17).

There’s no doubt in my mind that you can remove cancer, allow a biopsy to be benign, give a husband and wife what they need to love one another, bring your church to repentance, sustain an ailing parent, allow someone to obtain a job, change the mental condition of a spouse, and lift someone’s depression and replace it with a vibrant faith. At the same time, you can allow someone to endure and still bring your purposes of glory forth. I know you can do anything (”With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” – Matthew 19:26)

I believe deep in my soul but something hurts so bad. My gut aches and hopes for a rescue from the calvary… for what people could be experiencing but yet my heart is gripped with their season of pain, while I navigate at the same time through my own.

BUT I resolve to trust God that whatever my dear friends experience and whatever I experience in my life that it would be for Jesus’ honor and for the advancement of the gospel. No matter what we all experience in life (both the good and bad) may it be so that the good news of Jesus Christ be made known throughout the nations. Paul reminds my soul, “I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel, so that it has become known throughout the imperial guard and to all the rest that my imprisonment is for Christ.” – Philippians 1:12, 13.

Although my heart is broken, I count it all as an opportunity for the gospel to be advanced. May our “seemingly” life shattering trials and agonizing pain be the bridge to witnessing hundreds and thousands of people come to know the Savior. May everything be for the glory of Jesus in the salvation of humanity.